She is getting on my nerves now!

Illustration/Uday Mohite

My girlfriend and I have been together for two years and she unnecessarily creates drama to make me prove that I love her. This used to be amusing at the start but, after all this time, it is starting to feel as if she can't trust anyone. If she wants me to prove myself constantly, it is a bad sign because it means she may never fully accept me as someone committed to this relationship. I try and tell her that this is causing a lot of pain, but she doesn't seem to see things from my perspective. If this continues, I won't be able to do this for much longer and it will be her fault entirely. I once assumed we would live together permanently, because I love her very much, but I no longer feel that secure in this relationship and don't know what to do. Should I assume it won't last?
You have put forth your objections to what appear to be valid concerns, and your girlfriend isn't doing anything to resolve them. It seems as if you are already in a bad place because there is an erosion of trust, which is a critical aspect of any healthy relationship. Her refusal to change is also a red flag because it means you are both struggling with communication in some way. The fact that she doesn't take what you're saying seriously is a worrying sign, and this relationship cannot be saved without her making serious changes. There is nothing else you can do because your helplessness may give way to anger at some point.

How can I ask someone on a date via email? I like this girl a lot but don't have her number and want to tell her I have feelings for her. Is this appropriate?
The best thing to do is apologise for reaching out with an unsolicited message, ask if she would consider meeting you for coffee, and accept whatever her response it. If she doesn't respond, you have your answer.

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