On International Men's Day, a new survey has found that modern men have moved away from dating stereotypes and embraced vulnerability
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While traditional gender roles and preconceived notions of masculinity have often influenced dating and relationships, a new survey has found that modern men have moved away from the stereotypes and embraced vulnerability, pushed beyond superficial connections and become more transparent about their discrepancies and red flags.
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Dating app QuackQuack surveyed 12,000 male users from Tier 1, 2 and 3 cities, revealing a refreshing new shift in the way men approach dating today.
Transparency about red flags
Over one-third of the respondents between 25 and 35 reported discussing their already-identified "red flags" with potential matches during the initial chatting stage. It is high-risk, but they deem it best to be transparent about character traits that can be difficult for others to adjust to while they work on improving them. They disclosed bringing up difficult conversations like past relationship mistakes, mental health issues and work-life imbalance, leaving behind the "dark and mysterious" facade to open up and build a healthy connection.
Openly vulnerable
26 per cent of men from urban, suburban and rural India shared that online dating apps have helped them get in touch with their vulnerable side; it's easier to be open about weaknesses from behind the screen than in face-to-face exchanges. Sameer (28) from Delhi said, "Digital interactions give a sort of 'buffer' while sharing complex things like career-related anxieties, commitment issues, and even family matters."
Prioritising mental health
3 in 5 men between the ages of 20 and 30 seemed to recognise mental health as a priority and self-care a necessity. Ajay from Mangalore said, "It's a new model of masculinity. We do not hit the gym only to impress women; we do so to keep our minds and bodies healthy, and the sheer realisation of it is a significant development in the way men think. We also make sure to work through our issues before diving head-first into a relationship; we are open to seeking help."
Acknowledging equality
Nearly 37 per cent of male users above 30 revealed their desire for a relationship based on mutual independence and equality. Himangshu, a social worker from Assam, noted, "I don't mind splitting the cheque with my dates or being pampered with some gifts. It does not hurt my ego. These are no more gender-specific responsibilities. Why should one gender lead and the other follow? It isn’t fair to either.”
Responding to the question about dealing with a partner who earns more and the impacts of it on the relationship, 3 in 6 men shared that they would be genuinely happy for their partner’s success and wholeheartedly support her in achieving more.
Men, too, have boundaries
Contrary to popular belief, 29 per cent of male daters revealed actively setting boundaries with new matches, whether it is not pulling an all-nighter on call or boundaries around personal time, preferences, and, for some, even exclusivity.
The app’s founder and CEO, Ravi Mittal, said, “Owing to the large number of users, we get the front seat view of modern daters redefining masculinity. They are more open, aware, communicative and one of the key points of this study shows men are prioritising their emotional needs over being peer pressured into acting detached and indifferent while dating.”
Also Read: World Mental Health Day 2024: Coping with rejection in romantic relationships
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