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He gets angry when I pay...

Updated on: 03 October,2024 05:40 AM IST  |  Mumbai
Dr Love | mailbag@mid-day.com

I love him a lot and don’t want to break up just because he can’t handle his financial realities

He gets angry when I pay...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

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My partner is much younger than me, which isn’t a problem except for the fact that he is broke every month. He earns far less than I do, so I end up paying for all our dates after his money runs out. I don’t have a problem with this, but it has begun to have a huge impact on his ego. He used to be fine with this situation when we began dating around a year ago but has started to feel angry whenever I pay with my credit card. We have had a few arguments about this, and he says he feels inferior to me even though I have not said a word and go out of my way to avoid making him feel bad. How do I resolve this situation without it becoming a bigger problem? I love him a lot and don’t want to break up just because he can’t handle his financial realities.
Ask him how he feels about this relationship and whether he thinks it is important to him. Financial issues are a common cause for relationships ending, and he needs to understand that going down this path can only lead to pain for you both. Ignoring the elephant in the room and assuming that his financial situation will change of its own accord is not a good idea, nor is tiptoeing around it because you’re worried about how he may react. If you want to fix this, there has to be openness and you will both have to talk about it even if it’s difficult. To not do so is to fall back on your individual emotions and let them get the better of you.


I have a girl on my mind all the time, but don’t want to tell her how I feel because I don’t think she reciprocates. Should I say it anyway, even though I know it will cause me pain?
If you know this isn’t going to work, speaking out will only eliminate the possibility of regret later.


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