In sight of the recent set of lockdown relaxations, experts and singles weigh the impact of the second wave of the pandemic on the dating landscape
While many singles are eager to meet in person after taking the jab, some are still concerned about safety. Representation pic
The isolation mandated by the ongoing pandemic has seen several lonely singles turn to dating apps for their social and romantic needs. While Tinder recorded its highest number of swipes in a single day in March 2020 — 3 billion, OkCupid saw a 700 per cent increase in dates between March and May 2020 while Bumble reported a 70 per cent increase in video calls. And with Mumbai easing out of its second period of lockdown-like restrictions, the city’s cafés and restaurants are witnessing hopefuls ready to try their luck at romance again, after more than a year of being bound indoors.
ADVERTISEMENT
“The pandemic has definitely driven home the importance of people and of relationships. This, combined with the influence of social media, has triggered an increase in the need for acceptance. Stress levels are also at an all-time high. Our brain’s cortisol levels increase due to the stress of working from home and engaging with the same people every day. Going out, meeting new people and spending time with loved ones help to create a sense of normalcy,” says Namrata Jain, a Bandra-based counselling psychologist. She adds that some of her clients have even been travelling to other parts of the country to meet potential partners they have been conversing with through dating and matrimony apps.
Masha Arabi, Namrata Jain and Mohd Sulaiman
Mixed feelings
“While I was open to going on dates last year, the second wave has shaken me to the core. I am reluctant to even meet close friends as I don’t want to engage in any behaviour that will send us into another lockdown. Instead, I have been resorting to virtual dates in the form of video calls on dating apps. It still a far cry from physical dates, these feel more substantial than texts or calls,” says Masha Arabi, a 26-year-old marketing professional.
On the other hand, Mohammed Sulaiman says that he feels more confident with physical dates who, like him, have been vaccinated. “Of course, we steer clear of crowded venues and stick to cafés or our homes. In fact, it is only now that I am comfortable meeting people I had been conversing with through the last year,” the 27-year-old PR professional shares. However, unlike the past, where relationships could progress from matching to meeting in a single day, during the pandemic, he has slowed down and become much more mindful about the relationships he pursues. “These are connections that I’ve sustained for a while before I decided they’re worth the risk of a physical meeting,” he explains. Arabi adds that the delayed gratification of physical dates is compelling her to consider other aspects such as communication and reliability, which would have typically come into the picture much later in the relationship, even before the first date. “If the other person isn’t on the same wavelength as me, I don’t see the point in waiting to meet them before deciding if we can hit it off,” she says. In certain ways, the pandemic has taken away the casualness of online dating.
Joined by the jab
With vaccines becoming available to a wider demographic, dating apps have also been doing their bit to encourage people to take the jab. OkCupid has introduced an ‘I’m Vaccinated’ profile badge that not only matches users with others who are either already vaccinated or will be getting vaccinated soon, but is also expected to result in a 35 per cent increase in match rates. Sulaiman, on his part, says that attitudes towards safety and vaccination can sway his decision to pursue a potential relationship. “The closest analogy I can draw is how careful the other person is about contracting STDs. It would be terrible to hit it off with someone who is prone to risky behaviour or has contrasting views about the efficacy of vaccines; I’d have to call it off — this is non-negotiable,” he elaborates.
Safety first
Dr Salaah Qureshi, MD at Qure Clinic, advises:
>> Don’t go on a date with anyone who isn’t willing to wear a mask or observe social distancing norms.
>> Your first date should be in an open environment so that you can confirm that both of you are not infected or carriers.
>> Ask your date if they have been to a social event or public place. If yes, wait for a week after that to meet. Testing before a date should also be considered.