'Won't step out before the vaccine'

Madhavi and her family spending a quiet Diwali at their Thane home

Day 299. Sunday. It feels like we are living a Black Mirror episode. Watching a dystopian TV show is one thing, but experiencing one of the bleakest times of the recent past is another. Now that we are almost nearing the one-year anniversary of Prime Minister Narendra Modi's announcement of the 21-day lockdown starting March 24, 2020, the struggle isn't over. While life may seem to be crawling back to normal from the window, post Unlock 8, we are staring at mass unemployment, economic devastation, and are waiting for a vaccine for all.

And, while businesses, parks, malls and theatres and even restaurants resume operations in the new normal, not everyone feels safe. While some of us are back to taking flights, some haven't stepped out of their home since day one of the lockdown.

'Immunity compromised before COVID-19'

Madhavi Ahirao, 39 Digital creator, Thane
A pandemic that brought the world to a standstill, stirred up our already rough small world pretty hard. For the last three years, I've been battling with aplastic anemia, an autoimmune disorder, which is a rare condition in which the body stops producing enough new blood cells. To fight COVID-19, one needs good immunity. However, with low or no immunity and already on auto immunosuppressive medicines, it's been a tough fight for me.

Thankfully, living in a metro gives you the benefit of accessing essentials on online platforms. Managing household chores without any househelp and ill health was the real challenge. My husband and son chipped in, making things easier. The most difficult part of being at home for the last 11 months was channelising my eight-year-old's energy levels. Yuvaan missed playing outdoors with his friends, playing football and karting, and living a normal kid's life. Thankfully, his hobby of content creation came in as a saviour. His new passion for cooking helped; he also documented the yoga and meditation we were doing to stay positive. I hope all of this is over in the next few months and that we get back to our normal routine. With the counts going down, and vaccination roll out, I am hoping for the best. I want to go and meet my parents and take my kid on a long vacation.

'Daughter sits on a chair outside the door'

Siblings Alka Pathiyan, Pratima Sawe and Arun Sawe have been staying together in their Colaba home since 196. They haven't stepped out of their home even once

Alka Pathiyan, 71 Former banker, Colaba
I love travelling. Sometimes I go on solo trips, with friends or in a larger group. Just before the lockdown was imposed, I had paid for a trip to Baku in Azerbaijan. But, that plan had to be shelved overnight. So, when everything falls back into place, that is the first thing I want to do - make that dream trip happen.

I have been living with my older siblings, Pratima and Arun, since 1963. They are aged 78 years and 81 years, respectively. When we first heard about the pandemic, there was no immediate panic. We are a cool lot, and we take whatever comes in our stride. It was my daughter Priya, who lives with her husband in Lower Parel, who instructed that we don't leave the house at all. She was concerned that something may happen to us, and we understand that given our health condition. The three of us have comorbidities - we are all diabetic and have hypertension, so fall in the high-risk category.

But, this meant letting go of our caretaker, too. She would cook as well as clean, and since March last year, we have been doing it all by ourselves. It gets tiring. Add to it the fact that we are like any other siblings in the world - bickering is constant. But I think we are compatible, too, so we get back to normal very quickly. We play cards and Scrabble all the time.

Arun is really old so he makes a cup of tea on good days. I handle the cooking part entirely. And, Pratima, who is tech savvy, handles all the online payments. We don't deal with hard cash anymore. So there is no reason for us to step out. For the initial months of the lockdown, our society did not allow groceries to be delivered at the doorstep. But, as an exception the watchman would bring our order to us.

Recently, Priya has started visiting us. But she does not set foot inside the house. She sits on a plastic chair near the door and keeps us company. We serve her snacks by sliding plates in her direction. It's strange to live like this, but I think it's the best for all of us. My friends are leaving for a trip to Pavana, and asked if I wanted join. I declined. I don't want to risk the lives of my brother and sister. I'd rather stay home, stay safe.

'Afraid to even go down to the lobby'

Scared of crowds acting as superspreaders, Sharma only goes down for emergency essentials. Pic/Satej Shinde

Prachi Sharma, 30 Writer, Kandivli
I AM afraid. I love Mumbai, but it is very crowded. Even before the lockdown was completely lifted, we saw photos of vehicular congestion on the Western Express Highway. Plus, for anyone who ventures out daily, the crowds are a handful. There is a lot of jostling, shoving, getting into each other's face - a prime superspreader. We mostly shopped online. Amazon, Big Basket, and Flipkart and sometimes, ventured to the pharmacies and grocery right around the corner only when it was extremely urgent. I live with my sister, parents and 85-year-old grandfather. Before the lockdown, we would go out almost every other weekend to Andheri, Bandra, Khar and South Bombay for comedy shows, buying books, or trying out a new cafe. Now, I am afraid to even go down to the lobby.

I'll start going out only when the cases are down or the pandemic is behind us. I want to go to Turner Road and Hill Road in Bandra, where some of my favourite book stores and eateries are. I want to browse at Title Waves and Bargain Book Hut and eat at New York Burrito and Bombay Salad Company on Hill Road.

'Don't want to burden frontline warriors'

The couple hasn't stepped out beyond their door since March last year. Pic/Atul Kamble

Swati 54, and Pathik Vats, 60 Educationist and filmmaker, Goregaon
Pathik: The first person you meet when you step out of home is your watchman. They were under immense pressure. In those days of silence, the siren of the ambulance was terrifying. The poor staff had no choice. I felt it was on my conscience to unburden them from that fear and do my own bit. They were the most obvious help we had, but the least celebrated - I wrote a poem for them. There are tons of things we miss from before lockdown - like going out for meals, seeing the city, doing your own thing but our loss is nothing in comparison to the amount of work these warriors have put in.

Swati: We both agreed on the reason why we must not step out - we didn't want to burden the frontline warriors - and we felt if we can manage by staying at home then why to step out. We were very clear: no one will step out and nobody will step in. Being used to an entourage of staff, managing a home, while handling schools pan India wasn't an easy task. The best place for network at home was near the kitchen; this meant, Pathik had to adjust his cooking times according to my calls. Appliances started conking off one after another - starting with the washing machine. We had to learn to make do. Thankfully, when our water filter went off, we had a backup water filter, which worked without electricity. My peskiness of always keeping a backup for everything came handy. But we also did without a lot of things.

Pathik: Groceries were bought by the driver and he would leave it outside the door. There would be this long process of sanitising everything. We are not ordering food online. Even during a minor health scare related to low iron levels, we consulted the doctor online and the lab sample collectors came outside the door.

Swati: When things return to normal, there are several pending celebrations that need to be enjoyed and quiet dinners to go to where we don't have to worry about washing vessels thereafter.

'Waved at my friends from the window'

Kirti Tawde fears contracting the virus and infecting senior citizens in her Andheri home. The only time she left her home was to see her parents in Matheran in December 2020

Kirti Tawde, 33 Former PR professional, Andheri
After my firstborn, Ahilya, was born in 2016, I left my job as a PR professional. I wanted to dedicate all my time to her, and had decided to resume work once she grows a little older. I still remember when she started going to nursery school. She learned how to share, make new friends and do everything that a kid would do. I was happy, i.e. until the lockdown happened, and all of us had to be confined to our home.

Interestingly, I knew about the impending pandemic back in December 2019. I remember reading on Twitter that there is a virus found in China that may soon spread to other countries, and I quickly stocked up on masks and sanitiser bottles. By February 2020, things got serious, and I became paranoid. Cases were being discovered in India, and I did not want to take a chance.

I live in a joint family of 10 members; four of whom are above 70 years of age. They have had multiple heart surgeries, BP problems and arthritis. I gave strict instructions to everyone that we would not have any visitors. Not even during the Ganesha festival as well. But, they all thought I was being extra anxious. So, I had to explain the seriousness of the problem. That took a long time. Finally, when we did bring a Ganesh idol home, I convinced them to politely say no to extended family members who asked if they could come over.

I used to be a very social person before the lockdown. I would venture out every day, either to shop, meet friends, or eat dinner. So, it is hard for my friends to understand why I am still at home. On my birthday in October, a few close friends wanted to stop by and wish me in person. I only agreed to wave at them from the window when they came by.

I think being a mother makes you worry about all sorts of things. My husband, Akhil, who is an interior designer, has to go to Pune and Surat for work. He keeps telling me to take it easy. But I won't give in. What if I contract the virus? Ahilya will be left all alone, and she is very attached to me. I think it is the after-effect that scares me. Perhaps, some day I will think that it is okay to get out and buy groceries or meet a few close friends for some time, but right now, I don't see that happening anytime soon.

In December, I made my first trip to Matheran to meet my parents. They have been all by themselves throughout the pandemic, and I wanted to see them desperately. But this is the maximum risk I've taken. In a few days, I will be back in my Andheri home, and follow an endless quarantine.