Bring your own breakfast, please

Mushroom spinach omelette

Instagram is the window to deceptive realities. I have always believed so, but haven't had enough material to back this gem of wisdom. Usually, it's the virtual ‘filter-shopped' lives of people that would give enough fodder for such thought, but imagine a restaurant.

A few months ago, this writer chanced upon a recommendation on her Insta timeline. A new restaurant, Build Your Own Breakfast (BYOB) Cafe, in the heart of Pali Hill, just a few hundred metres away from the chic comfort food eatery Smoke House Deli and hit bakery Suzette's. Our first thoughts were that this had to be good, if it had chosen to arrive in an already competitive market. With a neon signboard lifting the dull interiors, fancy artwork and artificial leaf panels adorning the white walls, and post upon post showing off its delicious breakfast menu, it looked like a place worth a visit.

Pizza omelette

The first time we visited BYOB was in the month of Ramzan, at 10 am - because, of course, we wanted to enjoy a hearty breakfast - only to be told that they open at 4 pm. A DM enquiry later, we learnt that they'd go back to their regular hours - Google says 7 am to midnight - once Ramzan ended. So, we came back as promised a month later, this time at half past 10. Guess what; no forget it. It was shut again.

To be honest, it's a cutesy place from the outside - berry blue walls with red plastic flowers hanging from above. We knocked on the glass door, and a lady staffer asked this writer to return at noon. Determined to eat here anyway, we returned after sipping water - lots of it - at a nearby eatery. The chef and waiting staff allowed us in by half past noon. Right here, we knew that this was going to be a bad marriage.

Brun muska

It's a tiny eatery, tinier than it looks in the pictures. Four tables, not more. Since this writer and her friend were the only visitors they'd perhaps decided against lighting up the space for us. Not even the BYOB signboard, which in hindsight was the saving grace. Not to complain, but the loo, which was just a few metres away, was an absolute stink. We got a whiff of it now and then, enough to remind us that we shouldn't be sitting here too long.

This experience was enough for us to show restraint when choosing what to eat. We played safe with a mushroom spinach omelette (Rs 179), an Oreo cereal bowl (Rs 169) - they offer premium cereal brands like Frosties, Cheerios, Froot Loops, Reese's Puffs - and brun muska (Rs 39) to start with. Pity, we were eating breakfast for lunch.

The cereal and cold milk came separately, with honey as an add-on (this can't be reviewed, because it's ready-to-eat stuff). The omelette, much to our surprise, was a highlight. It felt homemade. But the brown bread that came with it was stale. We had to eat our eggs plain. The brun maska, well... the bread was hard to chew on and possibly a day old. We returned it after one bite. When the next one came, we were forced to eat it, just so we didn't disappoint the waiting staff.

BYOB is a cutesy place from the outside, with berry blue walls and red plastic flowers hanging from above

We had to be back at work, so we ordered a takeaway from their specials - a pizza omelette (Rs 149), made with onions, bell peppers and olives, topped with marinara sauce and mozzarella, and their Lotus Biscoff shake (Rs 179). The baked beans (Rs 149) we asked for, wasn't on their menu that day. They do offer breakfast platters with kheema, eggs, bread and beverage, along with a continental selection (fruit bowl, oats porridge, French toast, and pancakes). But we weren't in the mood to push our luck.

The takeaway was decent. The shake was perfect for a hot summer afternoon - a tad sweet, but not something that you won't enjoy. We shared the slices of our pizza omelette with colleagues at work. We did find it difficult to decide if this was a pizza or an omelette, just like we are yet to wrap around our heads about why a breakfast place opens after noon. This is a place that could afford to be good. But it's not even trying (except on Instagram).

What: BYOB
At: Shop 107/A, Old 25/ F, Dr. Ambedkar Road, Opposite Zig Zag Road, Pali Hill, Bandra West
When: 12 noon to midnight
Call: 98330 61935
Rating : Poor
BYOB didn't know we were there. Sunday Mid-day reviews anonymously and pays for meals and drinks