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Not entirely sure she is the one...

Updated on: 21 January,2022 06:19 AM IST  |  Mumbai
Dr Love | mailbag@mid-day.com

Anything is okay provided they both understand the risks involved and acknowledge that this can also cause significant damage to how they feel about each other

Not entirely sure she is the one...

Illustration/Uday Mohite

I am a 29-year old guy and have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for almost five years now. We have been talking about marriage recently because both our families have expected us to go ahead with this for a while. The problem is I am still not convinced that she is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I know I am not getting younger, and that she and I really do get along very well, but this nagging doubt makes it hard for me to commit to marriage. Am I being unreasonable? Should I just accept that she is the one for me and go ahead with this? I know she doesn’t share the same feeling and will be more than happy to get engaged. I am confused and this has started to give me a lot of anxiety. Please help.
If you are confused, you should take your time. Committing to something like this is a life-altering decision and it is perfectly normal to have doubts. It may also help to speak to a neutral professional and try isolating why you feel the way you do, and why you aren’t sure about being with someone after knowing her as well as you do. You should also talk about your expectations because your girlfriend and you will have different ideas of what this relationship means and what the future holds. If it is your family or pressure from your girlfriend that is adding to your anxiety, tell them why you need some time to yourself until you can sort this out. Taking a short holiday by yourself may also be a great way of allowing you to think about this a little more objectively.


Is it okay for two people in a relationship to date other people if they are both okay with it?
Anything is okay provided they both understand the risks involved and acknowledge that this can also cause significant damage to how they feel about each other.


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