“Family… you’re a part of my family… and yeah ‘fam’ can also be used to refer to a single person.”
Illustration/Uday Mohite
Natasha, my nerdy, nosey, nineteen-year-old neighbour (pardon the alliteration) popped in.
ADVERTISEMENT
I was attempting to read two books simultaneously, The Collected Works of TS Eliot and Art Buchwald’s Beating Around
The Bush. “Hey Fam, wassup,” she said, nonchalantly, blissfully unaware that she may be disturbing me.
“Fam, what’s Fam?”, I asked, a tad confused.
“Family… you’re a part of my family… and yeah ‘fam’ can also be used to refer to a single person.”
“Ah ok.”
“Rahul uncle, what you reading?”
She looked at my two choices.
“Uhmm... poetry is not my thing. Though I’m seriously into song lyrics.”
“Groovy,” I countered
“Ohoho. Bruh, who reads books anymore?”
“What? I do. I still read, Natasha.”
“No no, don’t get me wrong, I read too. I meant who reads paperbacks, you should move to Kindle, so much cooler, you can store multiple books on your iPad.”
“Enough, already, all these gizmos—iPads, iMacs, iPods, the alphabet ‘I’, so symptomatic of your generation.”
“Why aren’t you out partying, bruh?” Nats asked suddenly.
“Uhm, maybe, because its 10 am.”
“Dude that’s a bad dad joke. Don’t get ‘sarci’… why aren’t you out with your uhm… bae?”
“My ‘bae’… don’t have one presently.”
“Oh man, dude. You need a life. You need a second life. You need some life, beyond this.”
“Beyond ‘this’ meaning? What’s wrong with this one… I’m happy with this one.”
“Whateves,” she said (eye roll).
“Why you so chipper this morning, Nats?”
“I went for a run—a long run, over two hours!”
“You ran for two hours. Wow, that’s serious fitness, is there a marathon coming up?”
“No no no marathon. I went for a run on Metaverse!”
“You went for a run on Metaverse?”
“Yeah in a new avatar”
“What… huh… what’s Metaverse!?”
“Pffffft,” exclaimed Nats (double eye roll).
Nats looked briefly at Wikipedia on her iPhone… reading condescendingly to me:
“The term Metaverse is used to describe a combination of the virtual reality and mixed reality worlds, accessed through a browser or headset, which allows people to have real time interactions and experiences across distance.”
“I’ve no clue what that means. And I need to know why don’t go for a real run, on a real road, with the sound of gravel beneath you?”
“This is so much more surreal and fun. Who wants to go jogging on our messed up Mumbai roads, potholes in the centre, coastal road on the left, metro work to my right, I can’t see the sea anymore, capeesh?”
(Triple eye roll).
“On Metaverse, I can jog in any universe I want! This morning, I ran in circles.”
“Clearly not the Mahalaxmi Racecourse?”
“No bruh. Today, was the Rings of Saturn—the Earth was a mere dot, quite freaky, no smelly gym, with Bollywood music blaring. There I was with my headset, running round and round of particles of dust, then I jumped onto the surface of Mars and played hopscotch.”
“Nats! Why didn’t you just play hopscotch downstairs.”
(Double eye roll)
“Dude you have no imagination—always barking about the past… giving me a hard time about belonging to Gen Z and how great it was ‘back then’… all I’m saying is you need an overhaul. Don’t you think you need a new avatar?”
“Huh, no I’m fine? Why do you kids need to don other garbs.”
“It’s mind expanding!”
“Aw, Natasha, why do you need an alternate world, live in the real world, na kiddo.”
“Bruh… you know want I think? Your generation is terrified of change.”
“That maybe, Nats. All I’m saying is how about gazing at some blue sky for a change, not staring goo-goo eyed, hypnotised, scrolling down on eternal blue screens?”
“Okay, Rahul uncle. This conversation needs to be continued, chal gotta bounce!”
Saying so, Nats left the universe of my home.
Rahul daCunha is an adman, theatre director/playwright, photographer and traveller. Reach him at rahul.dacunha@mid-day.com
Subscribe today by clicking the link and stay updated with the latest news!" Click here!
