She had 10 orgasms with another guy. Am crushed!

17 December,2009 10:17 AM IST |   |  Diana

I met a gorgeous girl a while ago and have never felt so connected with someone as I did with her.


She had 10 orgasms with another guy. Am crushed!

Dear Diana,

Illustration/ Satish Acharya

I met a gorgeous girl a while ago and have never felt so connected with someone as I did with her. Anyway we were making love and I made her have mulitple orgasms. I happened to ask her later if she had them before. She said yes and that the most she had at one time was 10 which is way more than what we achieved. She said it as if it was something she was proud about. I've only had one serious relationship before this and unfortunately she was nowhere near as sexual or as willing to try things as my current girlfriend. It seems like she tried a lot of things and seemed to be sexually liberal which intimidates me a bit. I can't stop thinking about her having 10 orgasms with some guy and it makes me sick to the stomach and anxious and nervous and tearful. The fact that it is a long distance relationship and we won't see each other for a couple of months also doesn't help.

Name withheld

Dear Friend,
I have a feeling that she doesn't want you bragging about the number of orgasms you made her have, and so has already put you in a quandary, by telling you that she has been there and done that. Not that you should have any reason to doubt that. For all you know, it could be that she likes being in control and doesn't really take kindly to being the object of sexual affection. So she'd prefer being the one in charge. Did it happen at all or did she make it up u2014 you can never know for sure (maybe they connected at some level). It's in the pastu00a0 and she's with you know. Be proud that sex isn't all that's on her mind or she wouldn't be. All I am saying is, take it with a pinch of salt and try for 11.

How do we get closer?

Dear Diana,
I'm 17. My girlfriend and I are really close. She likes it when I lie on the couch with her and caress her hair. How do I make the next move to be more intimate with her?

Ulhas

Dear Ulhas,
Take your time and enjoy your relationship with your girlfriend and when you are meant to move to being more intimate, it will come naturally to you. Don't do anything you are not ready for as you will regret it later.

I don't like them being alone at home!

Dear Diana,
I'm a 49 year old divorcee and have a boyfriend. We get on well and my 22 year-old daughter also accepts him. My daughter has never had a boyfriend until recently. She's been seeing this guy from work and she says they're just friends and that he is not sexually attracted to her. However, she likes to bring him home. I don't like the idea that they are alone together in the house while I am out. I ask her to meet up with him elsewhere. My daughter is not happy with it. Am I wrong in banning her from bringing a boy friend home when I'm not around?

Radhika

Dear Radhika,
It sounds like tou are worried she is having sex in your house and letting her bring boys means you are enabling it? Let her bring boys to the house but tell her she cannot have sex in your house. But the reality is that at 22, she is probably doing it, so have a talk with her about birth control too.u00a0 I think it would be wise for you to have a very frank conversation with your daughter about men, sex and responsibility. If your daughter wants the freedom that comes with being an adult, she should be ready for the responsibility as well. Should she choose to move out to live on her own terms, you'll have to accept that too.

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